Many years ago, when I was a young publisher of learning resources, I was introduced to a Bing Crosby song by a training consultant. He used it to add a bit of showbiz glitz to his workshop session on positive thinking. It started like this:
You’ve got to ac-cent-tchu-ate the positive
E-lim-i-nate the negative
Latch on to the affirmative
Don’t mess with Mr. In-Between
Accentuating the positive and learning to reframe negative situations to seek optimal outcomes is something that has stuck with me all through my working life. Over and over again, I’ve worked with wonderful people who have helped me to appreciate the importance of positivity.
You don’t have to have a degree in positive psychology to understand the benefits of a can-do attitude (although positive psychology is exactly what one of my academy+ colleagues is currently studying!) I continue to be fascinated by the topic and through the creation of many of our resources, particularly our podcasts, I’ve continued to learn about positive thinking. ‘Happiness at Work’, ‘State of Mind’ and ‘Thriving Through Change’ are just three of many podcasts that have been a joy – as well as an education – to publish. The power of the positive never ceases to reveal valuable benefits.
To Have or Have Not
The words we choose have an enormous impact on our ability to relate to, receive and react to what is being said. (Have I just inadvertently invented the ‘Three R’s of positive vocab?!) It really pays to think about how you express yourself, convey your ideas and deliver your feedback.
Earlier this month we were recording one of our 2025 podcast releases (‘Meaningful Mentoring’, coming to you in March) and we came to a sentence which was about it being OK to not know the answer to something. We had a positive (‘it’s OK’) combined with a negative (‘not knowing’ something). As we recorded the podcast, this part of the conversation seemed clumsy and we were stumbling over the words. And then my colleague Lucy (the one who is studying Positive Psychology) explained that it’s much more difficult for the brain to process negatives. Human beings find it so much easier to grasp positives. Isn’t that interesting? So, we had another look at that part of the podcast and edited it, so it became ‘it’s OK to have no answer’. It turned out that to ‘have no answer’ was much smoother to articulate and much easier to understand than it being OK to ‘not know the answer’.
This very simple example reveals the power of vocabulary. The power to express a concept clearly; the power to convey meaning; the power to connect with others. It’s the way our brains our wired to receive positives rather than negatives.
That doesn’t mean you can’t express a negative positively! Indeed, our podcast example illustrates this. And it applies to all contexts. For example, when giving feedback, even when you want to help someone by giving ‘negative’ feedback, the words and syntax you use make a difference. Compare, ‘When you gave your presentation, you didn’t make eye contact with your audience’ with, ‘When you gave your presentation you looked at the floor and your notes’. Neither is ‘wrong’ and both are objective and non-judgemental, but the second helps the person think about what they did, rather than didn’t do. And I think that makes it more impactful and useful.
Don’t Tell ‘Em, Sell ‘Em
One of the first videos I was involved in creating back in the 1990s was ‘Positive Telephone Skills’. It included a learning message I never forgot: ‘Don’t Tell ‘Em, Sell ‘Em’. Essentially this is about selling the benefits, rather than just stating the facts. It’s back to accentuating the positive.
The concept remains a strong one. If you want people to buy from you, to earn their support, to gain influence, you need to persuade them. And ultimately that’s about being positive - it means augmenting your message positively, rather than merely stating it. When you want someone to do something, using positive, enthusiastic language gets you a long way. It’s always better to tell people what you can do, rather than what you can’t. So, if someone says they want something in pink and you don’t have it in pink, don’t dwell on that fact and shake your head! Instead, say you have it in red and how that colour really suits them and explain how it’s the best-selling colour this season.
Practical Positive Thinking
One of the most enduringly popular podcasts in the academy+ WATCH & GO® library of resources is ‘Practical Positive Thinking’, which I recorded a couple of years ago. It consistently ranks in the top ten most used titles each month and I love that because it means that learners are keen to explore positive ways of thinking (and yes, it’s also because I get a tiny ego thrill when I see it in the top ten each month!)
I try to live by the messages in that podcast. Of course, I do think negatively sometimes because I’m human and sometimes life is tough. However, I totally subscribe to the benefits of being able to reframe situations to optimise them and support a positive outlook. In the podcast I describe how I was required to look at a picture of a mousetrap and describe the benefits of it to a mouse. Such a memorable and valuable experience! Think for a moment. What ideas do you have for selling a mousetrap to a mouse? Do listen to my podcast to find out what I came up with.
It’s good for you!
Being able to perceive the positive and proactively seek optimal outcomes is good for your mental health. Closely associated with positive psychology are the twin emotions of gratitude and kindness. We now know that regularly recording what you’re grateful for and demonstrating acts of kindness are good for your wellbeing. And kindness is contagious, so one act of kindness often leads to another, and it undoubtedly generates positive feelings for both the giver and receiver. Even tiny gestures, which demonstrate that you notice and care about other people, boost happy hormones and bestow tangible health benefits.
Our podcasts ‘Happiness at Work’ and ‘Kindness at Work’ illustrate different aspects of the wellbeing achieved through a caring, positive approach. One of the great takeaways for me in ‘Happiness at Work’ is the importance of having a ‘Ta-Da’ list instead of just a ‘To-Do’ list. Recording your positive achievements as well as highlighting the work that still lies ahead has got to be useful. The first motivates the second.
Adopting a growth mindset
Being open to new ideas, curious about what’s possible and keen to explore everyone’s potential are valuable contributions to a culture which fosters a growth rather than a fixed mindset. This is how problems are solved, when collaboration works at its best and how teams, as well as individuals, feel resilient and successful.
This month we launch our ‘Growth Mindset’ Skills Challenge interactive activity to provoke thought and prompt discussion about the benefits of approaching setbacks and tasks with a positive, open mind. Have a go yourself and share it with your people to kick-start a conversation about positive psychology. Why not share this blog too?
Happy New Year
2025 no doubt has many twists and turns ahead for us all. There will be highs and lows. Excitement and achievement. And also challenge and difficulty. You can’t wave problems and unhappiness away with positivity. But as you know, I prefer to say what you can do. You are in control of how you think about things, how you express yourself and how you show kindness to others. And remember, always aim to accentuate the positive and as the song says, ‘latch on to the affirmative’.
Catherine de Salvo
1 January 2025
You can contact Catherine at catherine@scottbradbury.co.uk or via LinkedIn
For a free trial of WATCH & GO® resources on positive thinking and communication and much more, please go to: https://www.scottbradbury.co.uk/free-trial/
Scott Bradbury WATCH & GO® resources that are relevant to this article:
Meaningful Mentoring (launching March 2025)